Dearest Beloved Sew-ers and Lovers of Materials and Clothing!

It was Saturday after the 50c stall expedition: my ritual - after feasting on fresh pastries from the bakery, a spritze at the bar and a lengthy nap - of washing the great mountain of clothes I just bought begins... I already have all the silks on the washing line, and they are drying very rapidly, as it is super hot and windy today. The silks are TEN pieces this market-visit!! Including some raw silk items with intense dyes in them - which helped some lighter-coloured items to become more feisty, and a large geometric-patterned dressing gown/ house coat... The hoard this week is epic.

It is quite a discipline to get down to the lower valley BEFORE the extreme heat makes it insufferable; by 9am it is already very unpleasant to walk exposed under the sun for more than a minute or two, and it is a delight to drive back up the hill to Guardia, sit down with an icy drink in the breezy shade, and look over my treasures. The routine I have is fairly rigid; waking before dawn, getting cats fed, windows opened and house aired, last night's dishes washes and myself readied for the expedition. Today I took my best rucksack, which allows me to stack garments under each arm, inserted through the straps: this leaves my arms free for wrestling with the great peaks of clothing and reaching over the tables to grab things from the other side that catch my eye.

It is all over in an hour or so, and these scorchio days I elect to return quickly to higher ground and the delicious cool of my intelligent-architecture medieval abode (currently for sale!) - it's a quick an intensely-focussed outing, which I then get to reflect on and process...

Whilst I am actually choosing the 50c garments, I love the poetic flow of mind and hands: a sweet-spot rhythm thrums through me; I recognise connections between threads, colours, textures, buttons, zips, pockets - they make synaptic sparks thrill and circle in my whole body. I let every item that stirs a good vibe, to be slotted efficiently into the safety of my straps, and move sideways to the next section of the tables.

Some go clockwise, some counterclockwise, and we pass politely, asking - "Are you moving this way?" - then moving behind or in front appropriately. Mostly we are all patient and take our own time to look, feel, throw the garments into the middle of the table, though occasionally someone will be a tad more hasty, and upset the healthy balance of our rummaging, by tossing garments too quickly in front of the next person - getting in their 'choosing' space.

I like to have lots of choosing space; I need to lift a piece of clothing up, lay it down to see the full shape of it, turn it over, check its label... It is not nice to feel rushed or claustrophobic in this joy-full occupation!

My mind has to settle on either a future image or a remembered piece that I have at home, waiting for its twinflame to magnetise to it. I actively daydream in the multicoloured, multitextured space in front of me: every piece either ignites a vision, or it doesn't. The best sparking comes from natural fibres, shell buttons, ornate lace or handmade stitching...

I weigh up the possibilities, and feel into whether or not this is a good investment - it usually is, as it is only 50c - and I have to decide relatively promptly, if this will gather dust or momentum in my sewing rooms.

Getting home, I am impatient to get past the washing period, and to get sewing - so I sit down in bed during siesta and make some sketches of things buzzing around my imagination; I am most excited not by the silks this week, but by a pair of stretch pinstripe jeans! I wish to recreate the denim coat that I won the #needleworkyourjeans challenge with: I 'sold' it to a young woman from England who failed to give the agreed sum for it (as well as her friend taking a pair of beautiful trousers which she then didn't pay for, also)...

This made me quite peeved for a long time (and got in the way of me finishing this blog earlier in the week, as it set off a whole load of unravelling about not getting paid from others), so I hope that remaking the jacket - and putting an appropriate (i.e. higher, pay-immediately) gift-tag on it - will resolve that niggling residue of having been stolen from....

It is shocking to me that young artists could steal from an older artist; sort of the epitome of not-right-energy-dynamics. Our creative path in life is littered with opportunities like this, for us to Gift and Be Gifted, and where we choose instead to consume (and be consumed), it is a downward spiral indeed.

For the one who is being stolen from; I churned around in my head for months about what to do in this situation, wrote myriad messages, tried to be firmer and more official... and generally feeling quite impotent and offended about how such an IMMENSE load of work in a garment can be taken like that, without recompense.

I have quite a large collection of jeans now, both male and female, and there are always tons of denim things at the 50c stall, so in future and once I get much quicker and more skill-full at making denim coats, I look forward to harvesting a load more that I can play with.

Playing and fun with the items I'm buying is so key. I've had many phases where I wanted to dress more seriously, more formally, more smartly - but my favourite times in clothing are when I can add a wee bit of humour here or there to a garment or outfit. I don't want to be restricted in what I'm 'undesigning' to a style or pattern: it flows best when I am dancing through the fabrics without being so attached to anything - or to any outcome.

This is a strong theme in my life, to dance lightly - which I don't find easy to do! But having a 50c stall helps a lot: here I can pick up all kinds of items that I'd never be able to afford at original or full price, and I can feel free to cut them up, sew them together experimentally, recut and resew, and so on...

I don't have a deadline or agenda, and I have free-reign/ free rein to go as far as I want to, or feel to, in expressing through clothing.

I wonder now, quite often, about how the clothes will be received in my boutique, by both Guardiesi and visitors to the town, stranieri and friends... I wonder at whether or not anyone will like the completely inimitable clothing enough to invest in it - if they'll appreciate my rough edges and refusal to finish-like-in-the-shops.

I muse on how much folks will comprehend my philosophy of Making Clothing Magical Again (Atelier McMA) and of Living In Gift. There are so many ways it could go, with so much crazy in the world right now, and all kinds of weird vibes around money, earning, mass-production and commerce, etc. I want to remain on the edges of this, but also wish to take advantage of unusually large flows of people passing by the doors of the Arthouse (during the upcoming wine festival), and my visibility as an artist and visionary in this town.

Looking forward to reporting more from my atelier; I have at least 3 major finished garments that need to be documented and shared here in this gorgeous community... The way I am throwing things on the dress form and speeding up in my efficiency, clearing out the stable and thinking of how I can draw attention to my boutique during the hubbub of Vinalia... It is quite a feeling of spiralling upwards into my purpose. At last I'm getting glimpses of what I left behind when I stopped painting and making conventional 'art', and trusted in this new path of crafting artisan clothing: finally it feels like I am a clothing-art-maker!

Wish me luck - thank you for your support, upvote and reblog - as I send you all All The Love!

www.claregaiasophia.com