Ciao dear DIY Enthusiasts and Makers Of Things!
I am very proud and happy to be sharing my brand new, just published website with you here: claregaiasophia.com - it is a huge step forward for me into autonomy, away from corporate thievery, and into a much more succinct web presence that actually reflects my identity, values and vision.
I am certain that many will relate to the sheer complexity and heaviness of being 'present' online: of the choice of platform, the cost of running a website, the subscriptions and mailing lists to keep up with, the need to strive in order to be 'visible', the relentless offers to give you 'exposure' and the feeling of being ever-less-witnessed...
And then feeling like one might go mad with the tangled mass of what online is for us - our addiction to being 'connected', when really we're just funding our own entrapment by pouring our attention, energy and resources into the screens we submit to. It feels like I've been mud-wrestling for decades, until I stepped out of all the controversy, and just set up a neat, not-costly, clean website with minimal information on it.
I've had a few run-ins with fame in my life, as an artist and protagonist, I kind of assumed that I had to get as much 'exposure' as I could possibly glean from the world, in order just to subsist. I had a pattern of abandoning my fame and career periodically, because it seemed to just accumulate, and I couldn't keep carrying the weight of it.
This was ultimately a healthy attitude to have, because it helped me NOT get pulled further into the machine that is 'celebrity' and 'serving an audience' - I was never made for that kind of nonsense! It was a joy every time, to let it all fall away, and coory-in to my privacy and anonymity, to start from nothing again by just upping and moving town or country spontaneously! Or leaving mainstream!
I got to the place where I couldn't do that any more: though I tried to just sell up and go, no-one wanted to buy my magical Arthouse for a price that would make it worth my upping and starting again - getting older, the stability and rootedness of being in a familiar place finally began to over-rule the need to start afresh!
So I had to face the 'fame' and to find all the boundaries and ways of being that allowed me to maintain peace and privacy, whilst still being well-known and visible. This was a crazy learning curve: it took me years and the lockdown, to really let go of the co-dependent cycle of needing attention versus having a harmonious life!
I should mention here, that I am a highly sensitive sentient: I feel a LOT, and get sensory overwhelm if exposed to loudness or to chaotic energetic projection - and because I am quite 'unusual' compared to the average normie, I tended to always draw attention even without trying. It created a lot of controversy when I began to assert my own authority to NOT be fed-off or to NOT submit to anything which challenged my Right Living and Peace-Full Way.
It was necessary to get out from in front of the camera and on the screen, and to step behind the scenes again.
Sovereignty is a super-power. Being visible only in the natural capacity, aligned with our purpose and vision, is an inalienable part of our optimum health and vitality, 'online presence' is an oxymoron!
It has been a steeeeeep learning curve to really comprehend a right, free, sovereign relationship with the internet! And to release all of the ego and confusion around how to be truly witnessed in my Art and Life-Work. It is an immense joy to be rooted in Hive, and to not be participating in the conventional trickery and tomfoolery of striving to be 'seen' by mainstream. The hardest part was recognising that I get much more energy from having LESS: especially less income of fiat currency, and having a hugely diminished audience who ACTUALLY SEE MY WORK!
It was hard but BEAUTIFUL to be beaten down by the system as I endeavoured to play by those distorted rules: I eventually could recognise that it was effortless to flourish outside of the norms, where I was meant to be!
Aaaaah, the lightness of being from just being me, and letting go of all the needing-to-be-something-more-than-me-or-different-than-me just in order to 'fit in'. It is an exquisite form of heaven on earth, to stand free of all the messy cloudiness of it all, and being in sacred peace with What Is.
Looking forward immensely to walking forward into my Natural Wealth, Success and Freedom, without any of the fear and baggage.
Thank you for witnessing!
www.claregaiasophia.com
